4 Lies You Tell Yourself And How To Stop Them
Recognizing Self-Deception
The act of lying starts as early as childhood. When we got in trouble, we lied to protect ourselves.
Lying is a form of defence against the truth, it shields you from the pain of reality.
At some point, you’ve told a lie or half-truth to someone. Sometimes people get away with lies, and nobody enjoys hearing lies.
But, the number one person you can never lie to is yourself, the truth would always hunt you.
You are aware of the lies you tell yourself.
When you don’t perform specific tasks you give excuses. You blame the outcome of your circumstances on other people.
Why is it sweet and easy to lie to yourself? like I said, it shields you from pain.
Here’s a list of lies you tell yourself
1. “I’ll Do It Later.”
Later never comes because you keep giving excuses for not performing a task you planned.
“Procrastination is the thief of time”
You keep telling yourself that there’s not enough time to do things. Escaping the pain of performing the task, blaming it on the lack of time.
Stop putting things off until tomorrow, if you plan to do something, take action to do it.
If you complain about time, question your decision before postponing a task.
2. “It Is Because Of…”
You find a way to blame outside events for your circumstances.
For example, you fail a test and blame the lecturer. You get defensive when people correct your mistakes.
Your ego has blinded you and it stops you from recognizing your own errors in judgements.
Focus on what you can control.
Take responsibility for your actions, it’s normal for things to go sideways sometimes.
Do things with an open mind and put in your best. Understand that there’s always an opportunity to learn from your mistakes.
“When you keep blaming others for every mistake you make in life one day you’ll look back and realize you’re the mistake all along”.
― Abdulazeez Henry Musa
3. “I’ll Stop, But..”
If there is an award for the use of this phrase it would go to someone with a case of substance abuse.
People with addiction know they’re addicted.
There’s a reason why they haven’t stopped, they’ve found a way to cope by convincing themselves they’re not addicts.
“I’ll stop smoking”……. goes on to smoke🚬
“I’ll stop drinking too much”….goes on to drink three bottles of beer 🍻
The cycle continues, They keep giving excuses for their addiction.
You’ve promised to stop watching porn and too much Netflix. But you end up disappointing yourself by doing it again.
If you lie to yourself about things you do, question your thoughts and behaviours to take control.
Identify the triggers. Find a way to distract yourself and focus your attention on something else.
Seek professional help if you are suffering from addiction to a substance.
4. “I Know What I’m Doing.”
People tend to overestimate their abilities. Sometimes it is hard to accept ignorance because it is painful.
Deep down you know you lack knowledge.
You’d rather pretend you know something than look ignorant about it.
It’s hard to accept, but it’s an opportunity to learn.
Don’t be afraid to open up about your ignorance If you can’t trust your judgement due to a lack of knowledge.
Ask for help and be open to criticism.
You’ll learn and this would help you avoid approaching things the wrong way.
Takeaway
Do not deny the lies you tell yourself.
Breaking free from self-deception is not an easy task. I am guilty of it as well, but recognizing that you lie to yourself is the first and most important step to take.
Learn to observe your thoughts, behaviours and emotions.
Question your judgements before taking any action. Understand that the pain you avoid would do you more good in the long run.
